The art of influence: The single most important skill left that AI can’t replace | Jessica Fain
TL;DR
Product leaders often fail to influence executives because they center their own perspectives instead of understanding how executives actually think, make decisions, and operate in their chaotic, context-switching world.
⚡ Executive Reality Check 3 insights
Executives live in strobe light chaos
Their calendars are packed with urgent decisions jumping from finance to legal to people problems, often without bathroom breaks or time to prep for your meeting.
They haven't thought about you since last meeting
While you've prepped for weeks, executives need 30 seconds of context at meeting start to remember why you're there and what happened previously.
Everything crossing their desk is an emergency
Executives optimize for global maximum across the entire organization, not the local problems you're focused on solving.
🎯 The Empathy Framework 3 insights
Treat executives like users you're researching
Product managers excel at curiosity and empathy with customers but forget these skills when talking to stakeholders above them.
Become a communication chameleon
Learn what sparks your executive's best thinking - whether it's designs, customer stories, dashboards, or experiments - and speak their language.
Ask what the board is pushing them on
Understanding their goals, measurements, and pressures allows you to connect your ideas to their success metrics.
🎓 Domain Expertise vs Yes-Man 3 insights
You get paid to be the deepest person in room
Good executives want your domain expertise, not rubber stamp approval - bring customer anecdotes and data-driven insights to every conversation.
Question with curiosity, not confrontation
When you disagree, ask 'That's interesting, what led you to believe that?' rather than immediately pushing back with your perspective.
Build trust by killing things
One of the biggest trust-builders with executives is demonstrating you can deprioritize and say no to good ideas for the sake of focus.
🎭 Influence vs Politics 3 insights
Politics manipulates, influence increases good idea survival
True influence is about learning and strengthening ideas through stakeholder discovery, not manipulating outcomes for personal gain.
It's not my fault, but it is my problem
If leaders don't buy into your ideas, take ownership of the influence failure rather than blaming their lack of vision.
Go in to learn, not get approval
Use executive meetings as discovery sessions to strengthen your plan with their domain expertise and organizational context.
Bottom Line
Master influence by treating executives as users to understand - learn their context, speak their language, bring your expertise, and focus on strengthening ideas rather than seeking approval.
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